| Dear Carolyn: I’ve been with “Dale” for 10 years, married for 6. We have a 4-year-old son. Dale and I always agreed on our priorities and values, especially work-life balance. Until Dale took a new job about a year and a half ago, that is. Since then, he’s become obsessed with work: He works at least 60 hours a week, it’s all he talks about, he takes calls at all hours. The child-rearing we used to share is all on me now. He has been promoted already, gets huge bonuses and makes almost double what he used to. His new motto is “money works miracles.” When I complain about anything, he throws money at it. I’m doing all the day care pickups? We got a nanny. Yard going to ruin? We got a landscaper. No help with groceries? Order them online. This isn’t the kind of life I want. I want my husband back. Our former hobbies — gardening, biking, tennis, volunteering — he has NO time for. He claims the few hours a week he sees our son are fine because it’s “quality time.” Same for us, our time together is a fancy date night on the weekend if I’m lucky — as if three hours a week is a marriage. He gets no exercise, eats poorly and has put on weight, so I’m seriously worried about his health, but he claims he has no time for a checkup. He won’t work on this problem with me because, in his eyes, there isn’t one. Is there a chance he’ll snap out of this obsession as suddenly as it came on? And if not, how do I get through to him? I do NOT want to live like this for the rest of our lives. — Where’s the Man I Married? | 
